If you aren’t in love with your spouse, you’re missing lots of joy. The thrill of romantic love brings out the best in us. It helps us become who we’re capable of being.
But sometimes I’m in a crabby or judgmental mood and wonder why I don’t have a spouse who treats me the way I deserve (which makes God either laugh or wince). Then I need to come up with strategies to change my stinking thinking.
For example,
1. Strive to understand that we get to choose how we respond. If you haven’t read Man’s Search for Meaning lately, please do. [1] It will get your mind right.
2. Remember your history. Remember how you fell in love. Recall the details and feelings you experienced. Let those history lessons inspire you to see your spouse with the old adoration.
3. Understand that your current struggle can make your marriage stronger. View it as a test to pass rather than a punishment to endure.
Make the choice every day to love and respect your spouse, no matter the situation.
[1] Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning (Boston, MA, Beacon Press, 1992).